all kinds of weird dreams recently.. and i've been dreaming bout pple i havent contacted for a long long time, even though we used to talk almost everyday but somehow things just drifted and maybe for the past year or so we talked online for 3-4 times? it's really weird.. not forgetting the weird dreams about war and things like that.. haha, but it feels good to be scrambling for that falcon.. though i'd prefer the eagle, if u get wad i mean ;)

i've been really really distracted in class today, and i can't seem to focus.. in meteorology lessons, it just teaches us so many ways we can die, and i absolutely have no idea wad's going on for airframe and engines, even though i always say "yes" and "ok" and ask hell of alot of questions.. and somehow, i got a very bad feeling about this trip.. even though i dont take it as a holiday, but from the failure rate so far, i know it's not an easy task to make it through.. of course, tan was the first to graduate from france, and people in sg say he's so good he's as qualified as a cat b personnel upon graduation..

i'm starting to feel worried. i feel that i'm damn cui. this thing requires talent, and i'm kinda scared i'm not good enough.. even though on the surface it seems that i'm the fastest amongst the 3 of us, deep down i'm worried and unsure about my abilities.. do i really have what it takes? it's not a good time to have my morale down, but i really am afraid.. gab says i'm unduly worried and i should just focus at this point of time.. question is, how to? everything suddenly seems so difficult, i don't know why, but it's just a subjective statement.. i dont know if i'm cui because i'm cui as a student, or i'm cui as a person..

is there something wrong with me?